Archive for the ‘Movies’ Category

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Think of the chi^h^h^h orphans!


2011
01.08

I had no idea these existed, but they are hilarious… Fake PSAs used to promote the best blaxplotation parody ever: “Black Dynamite.”


Cream Corn makes sure you get the message about smack…


Bullhorn owns a nightclub, but he makes it a point to warn children about the dangers of drugs.. with dramatic reenacments!


Chocolate Giddy Up used to pimp and sell drugs. Now he just pimps.


Finally, Black Dynamite appears to visit Sesame Street to tell kids, using the worst possible song ever, that they should not think that drugs are fun.

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Worst. Trailer. Ever.


2009
07.04

The worst movie trailer ever:  Robogeisha!
And yet, I kinda want to see it just so I can MST3K it…

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Out of context


2009
06.21

“Soon the air is filled with mosquitoes. Some are male, and they will suck nectar somewhere and we can forget about them. But with the females the story is different: they are the blood suckers. And even if they suck a milligram each, the amount will be considerable…”

from “The Green Land” (2005)

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Funniest. Star Trek. Ever.


2009
06.21

I’m not a Trekkie, but since I bought Season 1 on Blu-Ray, I’m rediscovering the MST3K-worthiness of the original series with William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy.

Let me attempt to explain why this episode is so fantastic….

First of all, it combines elements of what we’ve come to know and love in a forensic procedural like “CSI” with the campiness of a 60′s show that takes itself seriously enough to be dramatic, but is hokey enough to make me belly laugh when I watch it.

CSI: Star Trek

This is also the episode where Mr. Sulu loses his mind and runs around shirtless with a rapier threatening random people who simply do not know how to respond to a shirtless wannabe pirate on board of a starship.

Sulu Loses His Mind And Goes Shirtless

Then we have a scene where a woman who barely knows Mr. Spock starts telling him she really, really loves him and since this whack mental condition is passed through skin-on-skin contact, when she kisses his hand…

Chicks dig Vulcans

…it causes him to lose his everlovin’ mind. Which manifests itself with the best acting ever in a sci-fi comedy as Mr. Spock proceeds to rant about never telling his mother that he loved her while crying. Seriously. This is epic stuff.

I should have bought a Mac!

Tell Mommy I loved her!

Of course, the Enterprise is in peril — and Capt. Kirk is losing his mind because a crewman is singing over the intercom, which is driving him bonkers — which leads to a slapfight (!) between Kirk and Spock.

Pimp slap!  (Reminds me of the "I'm the Juggernaut, Bitch!" video...)

Of course slapping involves skin-on-skin contact, so that means Kirk gets infected, which leads to him showing his chops as a Shakespearean thespian as he begins to ramble on and on about how the ship has to be a “she” because he loves her… and let me just say, it appears we were a few seconds away from Mr. Shatner dry-humping the bulkhead when they got back on track with the plot.

I would make love to this ship... if it were a woman!

I am not going to spoil the ending, but… trust me, if there is one YouTube video that lasts close to an hour you need to see, it’s “Star Trek: The Naked Time“.

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Blind Date With… Wolverine?


2009
06.14

“I’m not the one who set myself up with a were-midget!”